This Week on the Links
A new podcast, the damned roast chicken, and a poem that heals fish . . .
February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. Human Options, the exemplary domestic violence agency based in Irvine, California, has a new podcast series, Courage Over Comfort, exploring the realities of relationship violence. Their forthcoming February episode will feature CSU professor Dr. Brett Goldberg and survivor-advocate Guadalupe Sosa discussing teen dating violence prevention. “This year we’re choosing intention over pressure,” CEO Maricela Rios Faust says. “Healthy love feels safe, respectful, and supportive.” While we await the new podcast episode, Liberating Motherhood has this mindful article on parenting strategies that might reduce your teen’s risk of abuse while dating.
I love A Mighty Girl. Many of my friends with young children are agonizing over how to discuss world events and the current insanity around us with their families. A Mighty Girl has some helpful reading suggestions. For children and teens, they’ve curated a list of books about standing up for truth, decency, and justice in the darkest of times: “Dissent Is Patriotic: 50 Books About Women Who Fought for Change.” For books about teens forced to live under authoritarian regimes throughout history they’ve marked this blog post: “The Fragility of Freedom: Books About Life Under Authoritarianism.” For children’s books that explore histories of immigrants to the United States there is also this blog post: “A New Land, A New Life: 25 Mighty Girl Books About the Immigrant Experience.”
“I am heartened by the people rising in kindness and determination and vision.” This one is for the adults. In case you missed it in my previous “on the links,” Jane Ratcliffe’s Beyond has “Some Possibly Helpful Insights for Living in an Increasingly Terrifying World.” It may be the soothing dose of hope you need subsequent to reading Secretary Clinton’s important op-ed in The Atlantic lamenting the current war on empathy. And in case you missed it, Jennifer Blaise Kramer (Small Garden Style) outlines how one can connect with her own natural genius energy.
How about some obviously welcome good news in an exceptionally difficult new year? The state of Georgia has established the nation’s first domestic violence offender registry. Recognizing the dangerous prevalence of post-separation stalking, the state of Illinois will provide free Ring ™ cameras to domestic violence survivors state wide. The United States Senate has passed the Defiance Act addressing nonconsensual deepfake image abuses.
Photographer and former MTV host Tabitha Soren once examined “the blurred existence of motherhood”. She felt a need to recognize something many moms don’t feel safe admitting, that “having a newborn is a very sloppy, disheveled time of life . . . I felt very taxed and very needed, but also very invisible,” Looking back on this work, she observed, “I’m not really in focus, because my brain isn’t in focus either.” Photographs from her Motherload exhibition appear in The Atlantic. More works, and her recent collections, can be viewed here.
“The night before my husband left me he made a perfect roast chicken.” Belle Burden, author of Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage, writes for Oprah Daily on how one copes with an absence of red flags. “Were there . . . warnings I should have seen before we married, the ones people ask me about now, wanting something—anything—to prove that our fate could have been predicted . . ?” Belle’s book tour includes East Coast events in Tenafly and Wilmington, and West Coast events in Montecito and Santa Monica.
At the heart of Tolstoy’s Anna Karenina is the story of Anna’s son Seryozh. Author Lara Feigel cites this example in observing how the world’s most tragic dramas involve child custody and protection. Her much-anticipated book, Custody: The Secret History of Mothers, was released in the United Kingdom last week. An excellent excerpt appears in The Guardian. Book purchases for international shipping are available here. Also, be sure to follow Right2Equality as they help to promote this important work.
“Every once in a while, you stumble upon something so lovely . . . you feel like the lungs of your soul have been pumped with a gasp of Alpine air.” The Marginalian founder Maria Popova writes “This Is a Poem That Heals Fish is one such vitalizing gasp of loveliness.” It’s a lyrical picture book that offers a playful answer to the question of what a poem is and what it does. It’s a perfect way to introduce children of all ages to poetry. Written by the French dramatist Jean-Pierre Simeón, translated into English by Claudia Zoe Bedrick, and illustrated by Olivier Tallec, the story follows a young boy as he tries to save his beloved fish, Leon, from boredom.
“Everything we do is political.” As One Mom’s Battle founder Tina Swithin says, “Family court is political by design, not by accident.” It’s true that “the laws, standards, and assumptions that guide custody decisions are created through policy, not neutrality. These choices determine whose voices are believed, how harm is defined, and whether children and survivors are protected or punished. Family court reflects the values a society is willing to codify into law ( . . . ) Everything we have ever done has been political.” The complete blog post is available here.
There is further evidence that reading books helps us to live longer . . . (banned books too)! No surprise here. Yes, books do more than fill our downtime. According to experts, getting absorbed in reading, feeling a book in our hands, and turning its pages, allow our minds to enter focused, more meditative states. This lowers stress, protects against cognitive decline, and promotes longevity. So please keep collecting books—become patrons of your public libraries and independent booksellers. And please keep supporting your favorite authors of banned books. In Florida, Ohio, Oklahoma, Texas, and other states book bans are more egregious than ever and you might be surprised by the titles now appearing on banned lists. For PEN America, Julia Goldberg writes about the emotional toll of book bans as well as ongoing frustrations and loss of income for many beloved authors.
Ready for the weeks ahead? Jane Pratt (of Sassy and xo Jane fame) and contributor Bee (the zine witch) have “Ten Things To Do in February To Improve Your Life and the World.” Thankfully it’s filled with Aquarius energy! Dan Blank issues the joyful challenge to us to experience more art in February. Mara James (Unconditional: Mental Health Redefined) works with healer Renata Urarahy to bring us videos of the best of the best guided meditations to try in the comfort of your own office or home.
Finally, are you following the Walk for Peace? The popular livestream—in which one can watch Buddhist monks, single file, crossing the terrain—provides such a soothing, reassuring vision. Today is Day 102 of the journey. On October 26, twenty monks departed Fort Worth, Texas on foot for the 120-day trek—often in inclement weather—to Washington D.C. This 2,300-mile walk is meant to raise awareness for the essentiality of peace, kindness, and compassion across the United States and world. There are no lectures, no signs, no shouts, just the flow of “forward movement, intentional silence, and presence.” Temples, churches, and other community organizations along the route have provided stop locations for meals and sleep.
Thank you for reading Life Edits w. Stacy Stern
Stacy is an advocate for survivors of relationship violence, stalking, and post-separation abuse. As an author, editor, and consultant she has worked with hundreds of writers in the United States and abroad. She has edited works in the parenting space and contributed to titles on healing and emotional resilience. The Life Edits platform focuses on connection and continuing education for abuse survivors. Your subscription upgrades, gift subscriptions, and founding memberships help to support this ongoing work. Please heart-react to the posts that interest you most!